Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, loving dove.

Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup created dark matter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup, it will send you a sign.

Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. You must pray to Sogjarnsandrakboncussgup six times a day.

4. Never bounce near sharks.

5. Always treat snakes with great respect.