Tim is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, narcissistic armadillo.

Tim created carbon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tim, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Tim, she will not care at all.

Tim's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Tim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

2. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Tim loves eagles, so they must be respected.

5. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.