Mobpigtag is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, duplicitous aardvark.

Mobpigtag created the planet Venus eight million years ago.

If you believe in Mobpigtag, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mobpigtag, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Mobpigtag's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Mobpigtag's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never eat parsnips.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never wear orange ear rings.

5. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.