Rullbadcad is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, witty dove.

Rullbadcad created snails nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rullbadcad, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Rullbadcad, it will laugh at you.

Rullbadcad's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Rullbadcad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep seven turtles in a large pit.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not take Rullbadcad's name in vain.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Run away from orange otters, for they are unholy.