Kabhotfunbad is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, wise gnu.

Kabhotfunbad created an atom nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kabhotfunbad, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kabhotfunbad, it will destroy your home planet.

Kabhotfunbad's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Kabhotfunbad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Always help tapirs in need.

4. Feed all hungry sharks.

5. Never sing near snails.