Hoghimstik Gemfotcin is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, cheerful goat.

Hoghimstik Gemfotcin created the Black Eye Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hoghimstik Gemfotcin, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hoghimstik Gemfotcin, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Hoghimstik Gemfotcin's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Hoghimstik Gemfotcin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.