Farrakjabsom is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, unfair skunk.

Farrakjabsom created Asia seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farrakjabsom, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Farrakjabsom, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Farrakjabsom's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Farrakjabsom's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into blue rooms.

2. Always help snakes in need.

3. Always help ducks.

4. Do not take Farrakjabsom's name in vain.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.