Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, generous gnu.

Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut created time and space two years ago.

If you believe in Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moths.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

4. Never wear hats.

5. Gesstifhabged Mitbutrut loves ducks, so they must be honoured.