Gutlopneg is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, intelligent lizard.

Gutlopneg created the solar system seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gutlopneg, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gutlopneg, she will be very sad.

Gutlopneg's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Gutlopneg's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

2. Never go into fawn rooms.

3. Retreat if seven hamsters approach from the south.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Fast once a month.