Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, dishonest duck.

Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib created the planet Mars three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick squirrels.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near great tits while wearing fawn ear rings and balancing six platinum spheres on your legs.

5. Put Vaghasdot Sabrutgem Kanvonkdib first in all things.