Fassandhon is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, calm zebra.

Fassandhon created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fassandhon, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fassandhon, she will turn you into a mole.

Fassandhon's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Fassandhon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about eukaryotes.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Always help sheep in need.

5. Do not covet oxen.