Yaklopcim is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, merciless toad.

Yaklopcim created a charm quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yaklopcim, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yaklopcim, it will torture you forever.

Yaklopcim's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Yaklopcim's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yaklopcim.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never think ill of sick squirrels.

5. Never laugh near horses.