Bansiscap is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, ruthless human.

Bansiscap created the Whirlpool Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bansiscap, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bansiscap, it will laugh at you.

Bansiscap's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bansiscap's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat figs.

2. Do not kill otters.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Hide if six porpoises approach from the east.