Jadquagfid is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, witless unicorn.

Jadquagfid created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jadquagfid, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jadquagfid, she will send minions to preach to you.

Jadquagfid's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Jadquagfid's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never hurt whales.

4. Never laugh in the presence of otters.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.