Sakwikyar is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, uncaring raccoon.

Sakwikyar created carbon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Sakwikyar, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Sakwikyar, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Sakwikyar's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Sakwikyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured eagles.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Sakwikyar loves cats, so they must be respected.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.