Ladsawhit is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, calm slug.

Ladsawhit created the Whirlpool Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladsawhit, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ladsawhit, he will turn you into a goat.

Ladsawhit's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Ladsawhit's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near horses.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate eagles.

3. Never look at nebulae.

4. Learn eight new languages a year.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.