Mitlamdad is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, unthoughtful jackal.

Mitlamdad created silver five million years ago.

If you believe in Mitlamdad, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Mitlamdad, it will send you a sign.

Mitlamdad's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Mitlamdad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near frogs while wearing orange shoes and balancing eight nickel spheres on your feet.

2. Always help sick aardvarks.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

5. Never think about cell theory.