Nutfasshav is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, grumpy snake.

Nutfasshav created Asia twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nutfasshav, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nutfasshav, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nutfasshav's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Nutfasshav's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not trade with those who eat figs.

4. Never feed spinach to mites while wearing jumpers.

5. Do not cook food in pots.