Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, confident hamster.

Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem, he will turn you into a duck.

Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem in the centre of the settlement.

2. Liptargamgid Jonyamhak Larggem loves pigs, so they must be honoured.

3. Feed all hungry aardvarks.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never bounce in the presence of goats.