Gofmongum Bithoncim is a god.

She takes the form of a small, all-knowing whale.

Gofmongum Bithoncim created the Milkyway three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gofmongum Bithoncim, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gofmongum Bithoncim, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Gofmongum Bithoncim's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Gofmongum Bithoncim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair black.

2. Do not wear copper on your body.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Hide from brown rats for they are unholy.

5. Do not eat figs.