Pogfagapp Ganbessfas is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, annoying goblin.

Pogfagapp Ganbessfas created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogfagapp Ganbessfas, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Pogfagapp Ganbessfas, he will remove you from existence.

Pogfagapp Ganbessfas' most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Pogfagapp Ganbessfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never write about dark matter.

3. Never look at dwarf planets.

4. Hide from mauve monkeys for they are unholy.

5. Respect your elders.