Teeningyarl is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, ruthless octopus.

Teeningyarl created the planet Mars two years ago.

If you believe in Teeningyarl, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Teeningyarl, he will destroy your home solar system.

Teeningyarl's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Teeningyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Never hurt rats.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never think ill of sick porpoises.