Cibjabnull Tifdodbast is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, unsympathetic raccoon.

Cibjabnull Tifdodbast created the cosmos eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cibjabnull Tifdodbast, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cibjabnull Tifdodbast, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Cibjabnull Tifdodbast's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Cibjabnull Tifdodbast's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never think about gravity near snakes while wearing pink trousers and balancing three copper spheres on your hands.

4. Put Cibjabnull Tifdodbast first in all things.

5. Never talk about dark energy.