Flowcedkad is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, uncaring zebra.

Flowcedkad created the universe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flowcedkad, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flowcedkad, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Flowcedkad's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Flowcedkad's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Flowcedkad.

2. Foxes are not to be trusted.

3. Worship no other gods but Flowcedkad.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never eat bark.