Ceptettilip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, awe-inspiring crow.

Ceptettilip created the Cigar Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ceptettilip, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ceptettilip, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Ceptettilip's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Ceptettilip's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of apples to grasshopers while wearing turquoise stockings.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never mention rats.

4. You must never eat peas.

5. Never talk about dark energy near monkeys while wearing violet scarves and balancing eight titanium spheres on your hands.