Lopmondog is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, almighty guinea pig.

Lopmondog created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopmondog, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Lopmondog, it will turn you into a rock.

Lopmondog's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Lopmondog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in white rooms.

2. Run away from red manatees, for they are unholy.

3. You must never eat onions.

4. Lopmondog loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Lopmondog loves capybaras, so they must be honoured.