Farsafkab is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, grumpy salamander.

Farsafkab created life nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Farsafkab, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Farsafkab, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Farsafkab's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Farsafkab's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of nuts to badgers while wearing red tights.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always help seals in need.

5. Pray towards the west.