Bonpon is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, resourceful zebra.

Bonpon created gold two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonpon, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bonpon, he will turn you into a duck.

Bonpon's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Bonpon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick squirrels.

2. Hide from turquoise moths for they are unholy.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Always help foxes.

5. Run away if four hamsters approach from the south.