Wadtafhat Zigyattbum is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, pitiless hamster.

Wadtafhat Zigyattbum created oxygen four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wadtafhat Zigyattbum, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Wadtafhat Zigyattbum, he will not invite you to parties.

Wadtafhat Zigyattbum's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Wadtafhat Zigyattbum's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Hide if four ducks approach from the west.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never think about thermodynamics near capybaras while wearing gray kilts and balancing three copper spheres on your feet.