Hitflamfoss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, kind rhinoceros.

Hitflamfoss created a bottom quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hitflamfoss, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hitflamfoss, she will turn you into a worm.

Hitflamfoss' most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Hitflamfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair green.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.