Hogpakmangadzagstan is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, resourceful ferret.

Hogpakmangadzagstan created snails four billion years ago.

If you believe in Hogpakmangadzagstan, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hogpakmangadzagstan, she will not care at all.

Hogpakmangadzagstan's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Hogpakmangadzagstan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about wheat.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hogpakmangadzagstan.