Stikjapquaf is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, loving bear.

Stikjapquaf created light seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stikjapquaf, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Stikjapquaf, it will throw large rocks at you.

Stikjapquaf's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Stikjapquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always treat badgers with great respect.

5. Do not cook food in pots.