Carnelbum is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, loving snail.

Carnelbum created tapeworms eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Carnelbum, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Carnelbum, it will turn you into a dog.

Carnelbum's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Carnelbum's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism.

2. Never talk about foxes.

3. You must love Carnelbum.

4. Never eat strawberries.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near geese while wearing turquoise boots and balancing six gold spheres on your feet.