Zagarmflan is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, contented salamander.

Zagarmflan created Africa seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zagarmflan, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Zagarmflan, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Zagarmflan's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Zagarmflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about spacetime.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Zagarmflan loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

5. Do not take Zagarmflan's name in vain.