Lapyarpbeg is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, confident chinchilla.

Lapyarpbeg created the Black Eye Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Lapyarpbeg, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Lapyarpbeg, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Lapyarpbeg's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Lapyarpbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about black holes.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never talk about dark matter near tapirs while wearing red scarves.

5. Never feed bread to eagles while wearing magenta shorts.