Ruttiging Fastafpon is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, fussy armadillo.

Ruttiging Fastafpon created the Milkyway three million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttiging Fastafpon, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ruttiging Fastafpon, he will refuse to believe in you.

Ruttiging Fastafpon's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Ruttiging Fastafpon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Ruttiging Fastafpon's name in vain.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ruttiging Fastafpon.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.