Kondanpogfet is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, sapient mole.

Kondanpogfet created the Andromeda Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kondanpogfet, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Kondanpogfet, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Kondanpogfet's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Kondanpogfet's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never talk about snails.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Always help monkeys in need.

5. Never mention pigs.