Loopbigpid is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, selfish spider.

Loopbigpid created a bottom quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopbigpid, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Loopbigpid, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Loopbigpid's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Loopbigpid's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never write about nebulae.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Loopbigpid in the centre of the settlement.

5. Worship no other gods but Loopbigpid.