Somgubpas is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, tiresome meerkat.

Somgubpas created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Somgubpas, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Somgubpas, it will turn you into a goat.

Somgubpas' most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Somgubpas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Put Somgubpas first in all things.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Fast once a month.