Nigyarltan is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unselfish dryad.

Nigyarltan created water six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nigyarltan, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nigyarltan, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Nigyarltan's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Nigyarltan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear corsets.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not chop down trees.