Lamladrill Lagbossvab is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, prudent sheep.

Lamladrill Lagbossvab created the Whirlpool Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lamladrill Lagbossvab, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lamladrill Lagbossvab, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Lamladrill Lagbossvab's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Lamladrill Lagbossvab's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Retreat if four gulls approach from the west.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lamladrill Lagbossvab.