Jopdag is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, bad-tempered guinea pig.

Jopdag created matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jopdag, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jopdag, it will turn you into a puffin.

Jopdag's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Jopdag's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate goats.

2. Always help sick great tits.

3. Do not keep four whales in a large pit.

4. Never go into pink rooms.

5. Retreat if six snails approach from the east.