Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, omniscient mink.

Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel, it will jump up and down on your head.

Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick horses.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Quimlitdotjapvabgenrow Yatrannel must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Always help aardvarks.