Stigomtbod is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, self-confident manatee.

Stigomtbod created gold three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigomtbod, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Stigomtbod, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Stigomtbod's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Stigomtbod's Holy Commandments

1. Swans are not to be trusted.

2. Run away if six eagles approach from the west.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not kill gulls.