Ladjamtim is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, unjust hyena.

Ladjamtim created the Sol system nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladjamtim, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ladjamtim, it will not invite you to parties.

Ladjamtim's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Ladjamtim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never chant in the presence of aardvarks.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near tortoises while wearing turquoise skirts.

5. Always stare at clouds.