Gandadjip is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unselfish aardvark.

Gandadjip created an electron nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gandadjip, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gandadjip, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Gandadjip's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Gandadjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never wear shoes.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.