Stigmobhas is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, narcissistic crocodile.

Stigmobhas created a quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Stigmobhas, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Stigmobhas, he will remove you from existence.

Stigmobhas' most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Stigmobhas' Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Stigmobhas in the centre of the settlement.