Logpomnuttpopnur is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, kind dryad.

Logpomnuttpopnur created a strange quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Logpomnuttpopnur, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Logpomnuttpopnur, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Logpomnuttpopnur's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Logpomnuttpopnur's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four aardvarks approach from the south.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Never look at moons.