Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, benevolent hamster.

Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee created the solar system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Nibflisbumjatsisdudappwee's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Never write about bacteria.

5. Do not keep seven geese in a large pit.