Yogbusmiscad is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, fussy seal.

Yogbusmiscad created snails four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yogbusmiscad, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Yogbusmiscad, he will come to you in dreams.

Yogbusmiscad's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Yogbusmiscad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. You must never eat lentils.